Resourceful is probably not a word you would use to describe the staff here at Foodamentals. If we were resourceful, then we probably wouldn’t be doing weekend trips out to Taipei and Shanghai just for shits and giggles. But who cares, you readers get a badass article out of it, so whatevers. Compared to us, a particular netizen out in Japan(of course) has concocted one of the most brilliant DIY food cooking exhibition this side of the Mississippi. His brilliance is only matched by Paris Hilton’s singing abilities, of which, she should have won a Grammy for. But I digress.
Just about everyone loves gyros, shawarmas and Greek meats. But to my knowledge, trying to make it at home is just not practical, especially in your $3,000 San Francisco studio apartment that doesn’t even come with parking or a stove. Our food loving brethrens out in Japan have faced similar issues, but unlike us(where we would just call postmates for delivery) they have actually figured out how to make shawarma at home without losing your rental deposit. Their ingenuity simply requires the use of a couple slices of delicious meats, a toy that you definitely owned as a kid and a floor heater. Brilliant I tell ya, brilliant!
1) Prep your meat. Thinly sliced beef or hell, any type of meat would work here. Americans – bacon would be a viable option here too. Lay them out flat next to each other.
2) Season it to your liking. Rub some salt, pepper or whatever you want on these bad boys.
3) Take a chopstick and wrap the meats around the chopstick. This will be your makeshift “spit” in which the meats are going to be grilling around.
4) Angle the skewer onto a metallic base so that it remains upright.
5) Wrap the meat in some plastic wrap and leave it overnight in the freezer. The point here is to let the meat marinade overnight so that it’ll taste uber ridiculous.
6) Here’s the most important part! Call your mom up to see if she still has that old electronic “Let’s Go Fishing” toy that you use to play with as a kid. You know, the toy where the plastic fish would open and close their mouths and it was your job to fish them out with a plastic pole. Most awesome Saturday night activity ever. If your mom threw it out, you can always order it here, in case you want to do this all over again(I know I would).
7) Take out all the plastic fishes from the smaller circle pad.
8) Stick the makeshift spit onto the center slot.
9) Take out any old space heater that you have lying around.
10) Turn on the switch to get the fishing game going.
11) Watch the magic happen. Now that’s putting your engineering degree to good use!
12) Kill some time by playing the actual game. Cause you did just pay $12.99 for this bad boy.
13) 20 minutes later…
14) Looks pretty professional to me, almost a dead ringer for what you get at your local mall food court.
15) Break out your biggest knife and start slicing it up like you seen they do it on the streets.
16) Boom, instant shawarma without having to leave the house.